Growing Up

My life's been leading to this

Every hope, every fear

Time to face reality

Into the future I steer.

For my careless lifestyle

Cannot eons last.

So I've now gotten ready

To leave this in the past.

This year has been hedonism,

Self indulgence, no shame,

To get it out of my system,

Time to start using my brain.

This is the inflection,

The change in life's slope.

Easy mode's over.

Am I ready? I hope. 

11/20/2022

    The year is still far from over as I write this. But already I can say that this has been my year of hedonistic self indulgence. 2023 has a lot of promise, a lot of dreams, and a lot of growing up. To make the most of it, I need to start facing reality and actually take a bit of responsibility for myself and my actions.

A midnight flowery cactus

    Vanilla is unfairly treated. And I say this as someone who grew up considering it the "boring" ice cream flavor. In reality, there is so much depth that can be extracted. Case in point - ice cream or yogurt with good Madagascar Vanilla. Especially vanilla extract with a hint of bourbon. When added to a smooth, creamy, dairy product, vanilla can hit all the right notes, providing a nuanced flavor profile. 

    Which brings me to my actual thoughts - I feel like every passing year brings an increasing variety of (what I perceive to be) exotic flavors to the market. The other day, I was at the grocery store and saw that Aura Bora (not a sponsor) water was on sale. Seltzer is always great, so I picked up a couple cans. And well, who knew that "Cactus Rose" is that much nicer than "Lavender Cucumber". The later was a bit disjointed, providing a lavender-dominated aroma as I lifted the can, but the cucumber overwhelmed everything the moment it made contact with my tongue. Unfortunately, the powerful note also tended to linger a bit too long. "Cactus Rose" was much better balanced. It tastes the way a Honeycrisp apple wants to smell. No single note is overwhelming, and even the aftertaste is more subtle. If I buy these again, I'm definitely going for this one. Although some of their other flavors also sound pretty unique.

    As for the uniqueness, I've reached the conclusion that some brands are trying too hard to entice customers by throwing around unexpected flavors and generally just trying to sound fancy. I guess it works - I did end up buying those cans of seltzer, even though I hadn't planned on it. But I don't see myself becoming a regular customer. Aura Bora cranks up the price, playing on their elevated flavors, but it's just not worth it. A glass of regular carbonated water with a slice of lemon generally fills the need for me. Although fancy stuff can be nice in life, there is a true elegance in being able to nail the basics beautifully, to elevate simplicity.

    Perhaps I'm just a prole. But at the same time, maybe the brands are wrong and Occam is right. Maybe sometimes the simplest answer is the right one.

 

The Void

The void consumes,

The Earth and the Sky,

But the world marches on

As if nothing’s awry.


It isn’t a darkness.

It isn’t a light.

It’s just a grey fog-

Not a color in sight.

Spring, 2019

Nineteen Eighty-Four

There are some books which can be reread time and time again, yet reveal new insights each time. The first time I read Nineteen Eighty-Four by George Orwell, I was thirteen and frankly thought it was an interesting story, but couldn't see what the big deal was. Then, four years later, as a high school senior, I reread it again. But two things changed: the world, and me. 

The first time I'd read the book was about four or five years into President Obama's term in office. Of course, I remembered the tail end of the Bush presidency, but most of my understanding of the world had been forming under this single era. But by the time I was rereading the book at seventeen, I'd witnessed the rapid descent into mudslinging and hate that engulfed the nation during the lead up to the 2016 election. Coincidentally, the term "fake news" was getting used quite a bit. Suddenly, Winston's job of rewriting documents seemed almost applicable to the world I saw. No longer was it a relic of the chapters about Soviet Russia or Nazi Germany. 

Now another five or six years passed. And, seizing on Thanksgiving travel as a good time to return to this work, I reread it again. Interestingly, I don't think my new understanding was as influenced by changes in the political climate this time. I think it was me. I'd like to believe that I'm at least a smidge more mature now. And Nineteen Eighty-Four frankly scares me. What once seemed like an exaggerated satirical representation seems almost like an inevitable eventuality. 

People everywhere seem almost willfully ignorant of injustices that the people they support are committing. Discourse is replaced with hateful insults. Objectivity is frowned upon, emotions run rampant. The Two Minutes Hate, a concept which almost made me laugh at thirteen, now seems just around the corner. As we boo and hiss at Eurasia and East Asia, just remember:

Meaning of War Is Peace.

Freedom Is Slavery.

Ignorance Is Strength.

Bear, meet Life

 Yay. That is all.

The Grey

There’s hope for the future

The light- it is there.

But light causes shadows

So I must be aware.

The void won’t consume me

I’ll force it away.

It might linger about me

But I’ll keep it at bay.

I won’t let it control me.

I won’t let it cling on.

I’ll slip from their grasp

And sprint toward the dawn.

June 2, 2021

Macaron (The one prounced with a fancy French accent)

"Aim for the Moon. So that if you miss you're still in outer space, rather than burning up in the atmosphere. That would hurt"

~ Medved

 

        When planning a dessert for Thanksgiving, I wanted to try to flex my culinary muscle. And what better way to do so, than a recipe known for having few ingredients and relying heavily on technique. Yeah, I went for macarons. The French ones. Actually, fun fact: their similar names are not a coincidence: both macaroons and macarons are from Italian - maccherone (fine paste). Bon Appetit and Adam Ragusea both have good explanations. I actually really recommend Adam's YouTube channel - he has a lot of great videos explaining the science, etymology, and history behind foods and ingredients. And as an ex-professor and ex-radio host his explanations are really engaging and great to listen to. Can't recommend him enough.

        On the macarons - I went for a raspberry version, taking inspiration from the recipe published by Taste of Home, but riffing on it to make it raspberry. The end result was a tasty meringue sandwich cookie, but I cannot consider it a true macaron. Failed at getting the shell's texture and glossiness, and didn't get the "foot" (little rough rim at the base) traditionally associated with them. I'll need to play around with it more, but in the mean time, I'll provide the meringue sandwich cookie recipe:

Ingredients:

• 4/3 cups almond meal
• 1.75 cups powdered sugar
• .5 cups freeze dried berries
• 3 egg whites
  
• Raspberry jam
  

Recipe:

1. Blend almond meal with freeze-dried fruit
2. Whip egg whites until frothy
3. Slowly add powdered sugar to egg whites while whipping
4. Keep whipping until stiff peaks
5. Fold in almond meal mixture
6. Pipe into (preferably uniform) circles
7. Air dry for 30 minutes 
   
8. Bake at 300°F for 30 minutes
9. Leave to cool completely
10. Apply dab of jam to one meringue, compress with second one

 

 

The Storm and Calm

The tides take turns

Pulling me to and fro.

Waves raise and drop me

Lift me up, bring me low.

A tempestuous storm

Plays out in my mind.

But a ray of bright light

Shines on me from behind.

It makes a light path

That shows me the way

To calmer waters where

The storm’s held at bay.

August 4, 2021

Superfreakonomics

    There aren't many authors capable of writing about teachers and sumo wrestlers cheating before switching to the connection between abortion and crime. Especially doing so in an interesting and engaging manner. That's why, many years ago when I read Freakonomics by Steven Levitt and Stephen Dubner I'd been so impressed.

    Somehow, I missed that they actually had a followup: Superfreakonomics. So of course, upon finding out about it, I felt the need to read it. There's a lot going for it. Written in the same approachable, yet informative, style, it asks seemingly random questions about the relationship of two vastly dissimilar topics prior to teasing out their connection. It relies on data and statististics, referencing experts.

    Some incredible trends emerge - for instance, apparently having a pimp leads to higher wages and safer conditions for Chicago prostitutes, while the home price increase that realtors bring does not offset their cut (although other less tangible benefits such as time needs to be factored in). The most shocking one was that there are more deaths due to intoxicated walking than drunk driving when normalized by the number of miles traveled. 

    And had the authors stuck with this winning format, I would have been as happy with the sequel as I'd been with the original. Unfortunately, they decided to tackle bigger questions and reached for climate change... That's when the approach of breaking down complex questions into small logical steps breaks down. Climate change is a huge issue. And one that isn't amenable to being drastically simplified away. I won't pretend like I'm better qualified than their sources - I wish I had the opportunity to speak to Nobel prize winning scientists. However, the vast oversimplifications that they propose seem almost dismissive, and unfortunately, when the entire last third of the book doesn't sit well with me, the whole work leaves a sour taste when it's finished. A shame really...